Forgiving Forward

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Christmas with Family

THE BEST OF TIMES AND THE WORST OF TIMES

Christmas is a magical time of the year full of joy and traditions. Hallmark Channel has been broadcasting “Countdown to Christmas” movies since October after running “Christmas in July.” Johnny Mathis’ rendition of “It’s the Most Wonderful Time Of The Year'' has been on continuous loop in malls and shopping centers since before Thanksgiving. Most people have their favorite Christmas memories, some of which actually happened.  You see, oftentimes with our childhood memories, we romanticize the good parts and block out the painful parts. That is until we hear that THEY are coming for Christmas, which is when it all floods back in – the memories of the pain THEY caused – and the dread of seeing THEM drowns out the hope of joy in our anticipation of Christmas.

We all have these people from our past who wounded us, sometimes severely. When it is a non-family member, it seems simple- just cut them out of your life and stuff the wound. You know, fugetaboutit! (It never is that simple, but that’s another blog.) But when someone in your family hurts you, it’s a different story. Those wounds run deep! How do you enjoy (rather than endure) the holiday when you know that the offending party will show up? 

There is good news: Your freedom is found in faith and forgiveness. Do you believe that God uses evil perpetrated against us for His glory and our good, and do you believe that the blood of Jesus covers what THEY did to you? Will you have the faith of Joseph and will you forgive the way he forgave? 

The Joseph I’m referring to is the one whose story is found in Genesis 37-50. Joseph had major family issues. Because of his father Jacob’s favoritism as well as two dreams he shared, Joseph’s older brothers debated murdering him, then decided instead to fake his death and sell him to a band of Ishmaelites. Who were they? They were the descendants of his Grandfather’s alienated brother.  Let’s be clear here, it is never ok to sell your brother into slavery, particularly to angry cousins. It always leaves deep wounds.

The brother’s betrayal led to a series of other betrayals which ultimately landed him in prison due to false allegations. Yet it was from that prison that God elevated him to the second highest position in the land of Egypt. How? Though a couple of God-given dreams. The same gifting that angered his brothers endeared him to Pharaoh. Not only that, the fulfillment of Pharaoh’s dreams led to the fulfillment of Joseph’s earlier dreams. Pharaoh’s dreams foretold 7 years of bumper crops followed by 7 years of no crops. Pharaoh was so impressed that he put Joseph in charge of the storage and distribution of Egypt’s food supply. 

Life was now good for Joseph. He was second in command in the most powerful and prosperous nation in the world at that time. Because of the global famine, the world came to him. He had the power of life and death for anyone who needed food. Guess who needed food? His big brothers. They came to get food from Egypt. When they arrived at Joseph’s courtroom they didn’t recognize their brother, but he recognized them. Now was his chance to get even, to settle the score. But that is not what Joseph did. Rather than letting them starve, i.e. get what they had coming, Joseph rescued his estranged family and organized a family reunion in the best place in all of Egypt where he met all of the physical needs of the entire family. He didn’t avoid them, he welcomed them.

How could Joseph do that? The last time he saw them was as he was being dragged away into slavery after they sold him. And don’t forget they originally plotted to murder him. How could he rescue them and bless them? Because Joseph saw God’s hand with him through every betrayal and wound. He knew that, although God didn’t cause his brothers to commit the sins that wounded him, he manipulated their sin to put him in a position to rescue the family (Israel) from the coming natural disaster. 

God doesn’t fight Satan, He uses him. He did so in Joseph’s life and he did it in Jesus' story. Satan was convinced that he had a winning strategy when he incited Judas to betray Jesus and then the Jewish and Roman leaders to crucify Jesus. But he was playing right into God’s eternal plan. Satan thought that in killing God’s son that he would finally defeat God. Yet God used Satan’s plan to defeat death and to restore those who had sinned against him back into relationship with Him. The One who had every right to write us off, didn’t. Instead He paid for our sin against Him to welcome us back to the family and to the Father’s table. 

Which leads us back to Christmas and how we are to relate to those who have hurt us.  Jesus was born in Bethlehem so that He could make His way to Calvary. The Blood of Jesus covers all sin, including the ones that wound us, including the wounds from your past. So, as you prepare for the holidays, make faith a part of the preparations and add forgiveness to your gift list. That’s why Jesus came. 

Merry Christmas,

Bruce and Toni


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